Monday, October 22, 2012

Familiar Territory

Bonjour and welcome back to the BlogSpot.  Some fairly hot topics boiling over right now so let's get going here shall we. My last post I mentioned that I would be scribbling ideas down in my idea bank journal, however I've been knee deep in school work, running, and a new hobby in Tae Kwon Do over the past couple of weeks. Needless to say, the idea bank has been neglected for good grades, a sexy looking running log, and some decent race results. Back when I was a tyke I was entered into a karate class.  The instructor wasn't cool at all though, nor was he Chinese. There was something about a bald white guy teaching me lame maneuvers on the exercise mats that didn't seem right. I wanted Bruce Lee and I wanted violence. When I order my food, it's very important to me that the person serving the food is of the same ethnicity of the stuff I'm about to eat. Same goes for my karate lessons. He explained karate was about self defence and respect. With total disregard to me and the rest of my peers, Sensei Karl diminished our dreams of snapping necks and round house kicks with his croc of shit theories on this so called respect methodology. After never graduating beyond a white belt in my days as a minor, I developed this wussy mantra approach to everything I worked towards. Looking back, my background in karate, or lack there of, was the product of me becoming a terrible lacrosse player and a very good artist. If you haven't put the pieces of the puzzle together (my friends have), I am a pretty weird dude. Some of the weirdest individuals roaming the planet at this very moment are of the following breed of human being:

Ice Hockey Goalie
Gin Enthusiast
Guy With Bleached Hair
Guy With Blog That Wastes Your Time

I could catch a hockey puck like you wouldn't believe man. I was a young Felix Potvin back in the Jr. Knights days, and I was a very talented drawer. The artistic qualities I possessed back then could have taken me all the way to the top, but there was nothing sexy about a drawing goalie that always won the art award. Now if I was Leonardo Di Caprio in Titanic drawing naked women that lay in front of me, that would be a different story. The only problem with that is there would never be any work done and my career would crumble worse than Chad Johnson's. Now I love my mom to death, and I understand she was doing things in the best interest for me as a young gaffer, but she contributed to my pansy lifestyle when she would always give me a combover before school. Now that I've graduated from hockey, art, and combovers, Dane Moffatt has reinvented himself to become the guy with the pansy haircut. He is 22 years old and started gelling his hair off to the side. What....A....Doorknob. Since the entire blog thus far has been nothing in relation to "familiar territory", I'll transition over to that topic soon. I will let you know that my sudden interest in Tae Kwon Do has re-kindled the fire and drive to become successful in achieving daily excellence. Finding this inner chi has given me the strength to become magnificent at everything I am doing at that moment in time. If it comes to washing the dishes, Tae Kwon Do has taught me to be the best damn plate cleaner I can be. Backing my car out of the driveway? I'll honk to alert people that the beast is now pulling out of his parking space. Packing a suitcase? I'll pack that Samsonite 2 hours earlier than I normally would, with precision folding and efficiency. Studying for a test? I'll get Starbucks like everyone else who studies and study the shit out of those notes. You get the idea, Tae Kwon Do gives me perspective, drive and clarity.

Running. Let's talk running. In case you didn't read my last post, I pulled the plug on New York City and the whole marathon thing. I'm back at the Funshawe striving for academic and athletic excellence. There is this theory that if you want good grades, fast times, and enough sleep; you can only pick two. With that being said, I have totally abandoned my 7 hour sleeps and generally wake up before 6am every morning to get the friggen' job done. Early bird gets the worm man. Sure wake up call sucks ass at that hour, but there isn't enough time in the day anymore to be successful without jeopardizing some sleep. I love when people complain about Mondays and being up at 9am. Having to walk up stairs when the elevators broke down. They tweet about their #FirstWorldProblems, wishing their phone chargers would reach their beds and that they don't have a bathroom on every floor of their homes. These are not problems, these are lazy people. The same soft people who complain about snow and rain while I'm out running 2 hours at a time in it. Sorry for the rant, that was a little offside. Point is, if you want to sleep, forget about being successful. If you want you're drinking water a couple degrees colder, hit up my sister and ask her about the project she's working on down there in Kenya.

Running. Let's talk running. In case you didn't read my last post,.....damnit. We're back in familiar territory ladies and gentlemen. This passed weekend we travelled to the great blue collar city of Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario for OCAA Provincial Championships. The ladies came into the race taking 2nd place in every exhibition race this season, while the dudes have been undefeated this fall. Falcon men have won 3 straight OCAA's and we grabbed our 4th straight on Saturday, putting 6 guys in the top 13! That's basically a sexy guy in a red singlet, every other runner- pure domination. The ladies were edged out of a third place finish by a small margin, but we're stoked as hell for them and all that they've accomplished this year! Last year we were hurting for numbers on the ladies side, and this year we're back to rebuilding them and they have been running well, and looking cute! I want to say I'm super proud of everyone thus far, just wicked results and a lot of fun we're having right now. Definitely taking care of business along the way as we make our final decent down into Quebec for Nats on November 10th. Clint Smith proved he is the real deal yet again, Finally getting that OCAA individual gold that he's deserved. Past 2 years he's won silver, and he finally grew the balls to become a champion, good job Clinty boy! There is no doubt in my mind that Clint "If You're Not First, You're Last" Smith, is the top collegiate runner in the country. He obliterated the field on Saturday and even shocked himself a little. Other shoutouts go to my Mother, who continues to drop her times with age, running another personal best at the Columbus Half-Marathon in a blazing time of 1:47. Just amazing man. Shoutouts continue on with Doug Berk, father of 2012 Westen Mustang OUA Golf Champ Spencer, for running his first Marathon in Toronto last Sunday. Dougie is by far one of the most inspiring people I know. Growing up in the Berk household, I quickly became better friends with Doug than I was with his bad influence-of-a-son Spencer. Mr. B became like a father to me, and a funny one at that. This man is so legendary, that he was in a McDonald's drive thru once with a car full of hockey kids, and their order was taking forever. Doug said enough of this child's play and he walked into the McDonalds, walked behind the counter, and started serving the vehicle full of kids on his own. Doug became very ill a while back and he fought back and overcame the cancer he was diagnosed with. Heart of a Lion. Since becoming healthy, Douglar now competes in Triathalon and road races. Although he is a back-of-the-pack runner, he never quits and it is these inspiring acts that motivate people like me to continue to dream, and run for people like Doug. Spence, be more like your dad and less like Nick Spitters. Another dude I would like to mention is John Mason....because it's John Mason. JWM is a gnarly, hard working, boot wearing, mustache sporting, cow farming, joke telling dude that built Fanshawe Cross Country to what she is today. After laying the foundation for us newbies, he graduated on to run for the great SpeedRiver Track and Field Club in Guelph, where all those fast people that produce Canada's Olympians (minus Dylan Wykes and Rob Watson) train. He recently ran the Vic Matthews XC Open there in Guelph, where he hyped it up so much that he actually lost his shoe 30 meteres into the race. Like a total goon, JWM continued to run with only 1 shoe, while the smarter decision would have been to put that sucker back on and work his way back up. John learned from his mistake, and he's going to go beastmode on the 10k down in Springbank park this coming Sunday. That's where we'll be too. The Falcons will be down their racing the 5k. Come and watch us.

Fun Facts:

I lost my iPod for the 3rd time this weekend. I actually left it in my hotel room in the Soo, along with my Chuck Taylors. Damn my head was in a haze of confusion that morning.

Congrats to Brother Russell and his girlfriend Laura on moving into a home on Colbourne. Beaut of a place, love ya guys.

Forever in our thoughts, Trevor Barton and Ally Miletic. R.I.P

Cheers Folks


  1. amazing. as always.

  2. Making me giggle in class...could read these all day.

  3. Josh, another great blog. Its great to see your adventures described this way. . PR> C'mon Nov 10!! Kick it!